Through the years, I have learned many keys to living a successful life. One of those keys that have allowed me to live a life of true freedom, and peace without the pressure of trying to please everyone is learning how to choose to not take on offense.
I have learnt that by making a decision in advance to deliberately stop, breathe and leave, choosing not to take offence when someone is saying or doing something that is offensive, I am free. I have learnt that every time I take offence I am disempowered, and my emotions run to places that put me in a position of vulnerability and resentment.
However, when I choose to not take offence, I can respond with self-control and live in a place of peace and empowerment. I find it interesting that we “TAKE” offence, this in itself shows me we have a choice. No one can force an offence on us. They can do the wrong thing towards us or to us; however, they can’t force an offence on us, we have to choose to “TAKE” it or NOT.
I would like to say I have perfected this in my life, but unfortunately I can’t, however, I can say I have come a long way in this journey.
I always love it when I successfully rise above a potentially offensive moment and choose to not take it up; it gives me such a sense of peace and freedom.
To do this, we have to come to a place of recognising the damage we do to ourselves when we take offence. Our judgement is blurred, and our focus is very much affected when we take offence, we don’t have the headspace we need to make wise decisions. We go around in circles that lead us nowhere except confusion and resentment that are always places that have adverse effects on us physically and mentally. When we are offended, we allow our mind and emotions to create toxic effects on our brain and our body, not to mention how we affect others around us while we are in this state.
I have learnt that people, including myself, say and do things that annoy others. Sometimes they are deliberate sometimes not. However, it is inevitable that if you live and breathe you will do and say things that can and will potentially be offensive to someone. I have also learnt that while that is true we have the power to “TAKE” the offence of “NOT”.
It takes self-discipline, it takes knowing who you are and being confident in that. It takes not having to be right all the time, and it takes courage. It seems so much easier and necessary just to pick up the offence and go into defensive mode. However, it is much more exhausting to come out fighting than just to choose not to take the offence in the first place.
You walked free, light and empowered straight away when you rise above it and leave it with them to deal with while you move onto something else much more enjoyable and productive. Try it the next time someone says or does something that brings offence to you, STOP, BREATHE and LEAVE. Do you want this to tie you in knots while you busily defend your post putting your whole system under stress or do you want to be empowered and rise above it?
You have to plan in advance or it just doesn’t happen, make your decision now before the offence comes. Leave it to them, let them have the problem, and you walk free and enjoy the rest of your day. We all have the amazing ability to choose, God gave it to us all, be offended or be free and live in a place of peace. When we bring this into practice at home and teach our children how to live like this, we are empowering them to rise above the situation and fly like Eagles.
I wish I had have learnt this in earlier years while my children were very young so I could instill it in them more. I believe those who master this in their lives are among the most powerful people in the world. STOP, BREATHE and LEAVE.