What a strange title for an article but from what I learned this week, may I always grow like a lobster. Don’t quit now, read on and may we all be LOBSTERS!
One critical thing I have learnt throughout my life is that if we want to grow and expand ourselves, it will always mean there will be some uncomfortable moments. I learned quite a few years ago that when I am in a place of total comfort, I am usually in a place of stagnation in my life.
Growth can be a very exciting thing and come with enormous benefits. However, it usually comes through some very uncomfortable times. As I look back over the years and see when and how I have grown as a person, I am very grateful that I made the tough decisions I needed to for the growth to come. Rob and I made the decision early in our married life that we would never settle for the norm but we would encourage and push each other along to be growing at all times. The old saying “Still waters stink” is very true, we need to be seeing ourselves growing and developing at all stages in our lives or we will become unhealthy physically, spiritually, emotionally and intellectually.
As parents and grandparents, we need to encourage our children to push through the times of being uncomfortable until they see themselves achieve growth. Learning how to face a task that seems too hard and working through it to victory is the best feeling. If we don’t help them see that the uncomfortable part is just part of the process, we will stunt their growth and hold them back from their full potential.
There is a lot of truth in the saying” no pain, no gain”, we don’t need to push them into something beyond their capability however we need to help them try and have a go at things we are confident they can achieve. Things whereby their initial reaction may be one of hesitancy. I have been observing my Son in love Joel just today as we are on a family holiday together. All four families and Rob and I together on the Gold Coast. This morning our little Sarah, who is two years old, was afraid to go in the small waves with Joel, she wasn’t super scared just very hesitant. Joel was fantastic; he didn’t take her out as soon as she showed fear, he just cuddled her tighter, kept speaking to her about how amazing she was and how the little waves were lots of fun, slowly helping her gain her confidence until she was having the best time ever.
If Joel had taken her out as soon as she showed signs of being uncomfortable, she wouldn’t have grown in her experiences of the beach. Joel himself is having an experience of growth at the beach this week; he has never done much surfboard riding and he and Anna and their little family moved to the beach just over a year ago. So, our son, Michael is teaching Joel while on holiday and giving him some instruction.
It’s great to see a grown man not worried about giving something new a go and expanding his abilities; he is enjoying it and getting quite good at it. He bought new boards for himself and one for the four children so that when he is able, they will all go
I love that the children are observing first hand how their fathers are learning new things all the time and growing as people, never standing still in their development. Children need to see their parents attempting new challenges even if they watch you do it scared it will add so much value to them and help them to see first hand how new challenges are to be embraced.
We went on a bush walk yesterday and went up a mountain to a beautiful waterfall; it was just gorgeous. Our teenage granddaughter Amelia was with us, the water was very cold and the rocks were all covered in slimy moss so it was very tricky and definitely out of our comfort zones. I loved watching Amelia jump in very hesitant of the cold water joining us as we all had our breath taken away for the first few minuets and then as our bodies adjusted to the temperature having a fantastic time in amongst the beauty of nature. Before too long she was, with our seven-year-old grandson Lucius , climbing the slippery rocks going out of their comfort zones and sliding down the waterfall amongst lots of squeals and laughter. We made sure of course that it was all safe. However, they had to step outside their comfort zones to achieve such fun.
All these experiences as children and teenagers help them grow and learn to step outside the comfort of the usual so they can go beyond and reach their full potential. Give your children new experiences, as many as you can, do it with them and see how much fun you have. Always be checking yourself and make sure you don’t stay in your comfort zone because it will hold you back and will also hold your children back. Grandparents need to be doing new things too; I love seeing how the children get excited when Grandma and Pa join in on the new experiences.
Life is magnificent and it will be what we make of it ourselves. There will always be challenges that we face and can conquer however it takes making a choice each time. A choice to get out there and have a go or shrink back and stay where we are comfortable. The interesting thing is that the comfortable will inevitably turn into uncomfortable if we stay there too long. So, we might as well get out there and show ourselves and those following us just how good it feels when we achieve things we thought impossible before. Life is meant for living and growing.