One of life’s greatest keys that I have learned over the years is the power of valuing others. As I grow older, I understand even more why it is so empowering for ourselves when we place value on other people, no matter who they are.
I have been on a journey of learning how to do this, and I believe while it is one of the most valuable lessons in life, it is one of
the hardest things to do at times. I have found those who feel valued and have a clear understanding of their value find it easier than those who are feeling devalued and don’t know their value. They don’t know it or where it is established or even how to determine value within themselves. One of the reasons we find it so difficult to understand our value is because we usually measure it by:
1. What we do, e.g., Our position at work or our qualifications.
2. What we own, e.g., How big our house is, the car we drive, our salary, what suburb we live.
3. What group of friends we have, e.g., Are we popular, is our group the “in crowd”, is our social life flourishing, etc.
Our value needs to be established in something or someone that can’t be changed and can’t be taken away from us ever. If we place our value on something like our job, our friends, the way we look or our possessions, we are setting ourselves up for disaster. When our value system is founded on these things, we leave ourselves very vulnerable and the foundation of who we are and what our value and worth is is standing on shaky ground. Find your value by who you ARE, not by what you do, what you own, what qualifications you do or don’t have or by who your friends are.
Who are you ? Can you describe yourself without using your possessions, your qualifications, your marital status or anything else that can change in the future? What is it about you, that says you are valuable that can’t be taken away from you ever?
When we know the answers to these questions, and we know them deep down, then we are free to place value onto and into other people. We will start to see the value in others much easier. Not for what they can do for us but what we can place into them and on them for who they are as valuable people. People receive their value and worth from different sources; I find my value from knowing I am loved and cherished by Jesus and my parents always loved and believed in me. God and my parents have always spoken life into and over me. My foundation is one that no one can ever take or touch. It’s priceless and lasts forever. My parents have passed away now but their love for me and belief in me can never be taken from me. Understanding, unconditional love has been proved to empower people to live stable, productive lives with purpose and value.
When we are confident of our value, we are in a beautiful position to place value on others so they can live a life of purpose and strength making a difference in this world. As parents, in particular, we need to be sure of where our value is established so we can help our children know their value. Our unconditional love for them is the first foundational step to our children knowing their value and worth. This can never be taken away from them regardless of what they come up against in life. They will have that strong sense of value as a filter by which to sift life. Let’s search and find our value, give our children and grandchildren a strong foundation of value and worth by loving them and believing in them no matter what.
Keep reminding them of their value to you, not because of what they do or don’t do but because of who they are to you. Then let’s show them how to add deliberately value to their friends, putting their friends need before theirs. We can teach them this by how we add value to our partners, when we add value to our spouses we add value to ourselves because we are one with them. On the other hand, when we devalue our spouses we devalue ourselves because of the same reason. Our children watch this relationship more than any other to learn how to value others, be careful and deliberate about your valuing of your spouse. This is a tough one, I know!
As we step out and deliberately add value to people in our world. Even when they may not appreciate us, we will show our children how to live in real freedom and how to live with purpose and value. You are valuable, you were born with a purpose, and it is much more than what you have that gives you that value and purpose.
I have a friend who today posted something very special about her daughter have a look at it and see what you think. Feel free to click on the image and read more of her articles or follow her on Instagram @susanjsohn. She’s all things inspiring, challenging and motivating.
Blessings to you all because you are valuable and were born to be valued.