Benjamin Franklin said, “Tell me, and I forget, teach me, and I may remember, involve me, and I learn.”
It doesn’t matter what line of work you’re in, we all need someone in our corner who is going to cheer us on and give us a kick up the bum, if necessary when required.I’m not referring to a critical parent or a bossy friend who thinks they’ve got it all together and revels in your misfortune or missed steps. No one needs that, and if you have it, you need to learn to silence those voices in your lives. What I’m referring to is much deeper and more than someone pointing out your foibles, I’m referring to a mentor. Someone who ‘sees’ you and sees what you’re capable of and who you really, truly are. A mentor is someone who listens and helps guide you along the path not in an ‘all the answers’ type of way but instead in a leading question kind of way. They walk alongside you, listen, ask smart and healthy questions that cause you to come to conclusions on your own.A mentor isn’t someone who marks your test score; preferably they are someone who helps you come up with your test questions, and they help guide you and keep you on course. A mentor is often older, more seasoned in an area of life that you have identified as successful by your measurement tool.Perhaps it’s by watching them with their children who are older than yours; maybe it’s the way they manage their finances or negotiate relationships with teens or how they build into their marriage. Maybe it’s business related and they have developed a strong business with a great company culture or it could be their physical being, the way they care for themselves. It could be their spiritual walk and the way they just seem to keep it together; they radiate peace and satisfaction with all facets of life. It doesn’t matter what it is, what matters is that you’ve seen something you admire in the way they conduct themselves and live their lives and you are curious as to what their influence in your life would be like.I want to encourage you, whatever stage of life you’re in to put up your hand, let people know that you are keen to have a mentor speak into your life. Be brave and tuck yourself under someone who has gone before you, who have blazed trails and has broken through glass ceilings. I promise, as you do this, your life will only be enhanced for good. Remember, this isn’t a tsk tsk kind of relationship whereby you are always being criticised and rebuked, instead, this is a relationship built on mutual trust and respect.
Reasons why we all need a mentor in our life?
Trusted: Mentors are trustworthy. Now, this means you MUST pick wisely. This is a person you are going to let into your world and truths will be shared so choose well. Not everyone can be a mentor, and not everyone who is should be. Before you commit to someone or ask someone have some initial conversations to make sure they are right for you. Then, be prepared to get a little vulnerable in a safe place.Wisdom: Mentors have wisdom that we want and crave. They usually share it in spits and spurts so that we don’t become overloaded and weighed down but in a way that we can hear, reflect, hear again and activate.Correction: We all need a little correction in our lives, and most times our significant other or children aren’t the right people for the job. It’s incredible how our spouses can say something that can trigger a whirlwind and flurry of activity, angst and frustration. Our mentor says the same thing, and for whatever reason, we are open to wrestling with the thought, the idea or the correction.Permission: A good mentor gives you permission to dream and to ponder and consider things that may in other spaces be shut down. Their skin in the game is different than that of a significant other, so the ability to dream, to imagine works with them and usually they will guide you back to where you actually need to be and you don’t even notice you’ve come full circle with a conversation. They are excellent sounding boards.Experience: Mentors are usually older so have more life and living skills under their belt. Through this, they can gently guide you down specific pathways that you once may never have even considered.Free: Unlike a life coach or a business coach mentors don’t have an hourly rate attached to them. Usually they have said yes to a mentoring experience/encounter with you because they genuinely like you and see great things in and through you that they want to invest in. A mentor is different to a life coach in many ways, and in many cases, some people I know have both. Free doesn’t mean casual and no KPI’s a good mentor will set times to see you and will stick to the time they have for that meeting, it may feel much like a meeting only because there needs to be some structure to your connecting. Also, they will hold you to a plan and will help you determine some outcomes and strategy to get you from where you are to where you want to be. A good thing.So friends, I encourage you to find someone who can speak into your life in this way. If you’ve identified someone you admire or would love more of in your life then put up your hand, let them know you’re keen and willing and if they are open you would like to explore what a mentoring relationship could look like. Remember, they are probably new at it so there could be a few bumps in the road. Hold lightly to the arrangement and let it flow as it should and I assure you, you won’t be disappointed.Now, get out there and ask someone to speak into your life.Much love,Susanna #littlemiraclescommunity